Confident
by Grilled Cheesby
Summary: Nothing is wrong, per se, but Kakashi didn't survive as long as he has without a healthy level of paranoia. Nothing might be wrong, but that doesn't mean that everything is right. UNFINISHED & ABANDONED.


**Summary: **_Nothing is wrong, per se, but Kakashi didn't survive as long as he has without a healthy level of paranoia. Nothing might be wrong, but that doesn't mean that everything is _right_._

**ok so this is my unfinished entry for the upcoming kakairu big bang. i had to drop out, unfortunately, and i cant seem to gather the energy to finish it, so here it is unfinished.**

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**Confident**

**I.**

Kakashi is asleep one second and then the next he is crouched low to the ground, senses on alert as he rests next to his bed. His head is ringing from a blinding headache and he has to fight to keep his vision from blurring as he warily takes in his surroundings. His left eye is blurrier than his right, a steady pounding emanating from his eye. He feels unsteady on his feet, almost like he's drunk, even though he feels cold stone sober.

Nothing is wrong, per se, but Kakashi didn't survive as long as he has without a healthy level of paranoia. Nothing might be wrong, but that doesn't mean that everything is _right_.

The first thing that's not right is the fact that his bed sheets are wrong. It's certainly an odd detail to latch onto, but Kakashi remembers the fluttery feeling of contentment when his team had ambushed him at his home, birthday presents clutched in their hands. Sakura, ever the practical one, gave him homemade coupons that he could use to get out of Hokage work.

(_"It's an 'I won't tell them where you are' coupon," Sakura says cheerfully. "You hand me the coupon whenever you need a break and I'll do my best to make sure no one bothers you for a couple of hours!"_

_Kakashi took them from her, smile in place, and then immediately handed one back to her. "I'm supposed to be in a meeting with Tsunade right now."_)

Naruto, because he was always a cheeky brat, gave him coupons to Ichiraku's.

(_"You know," Naruto had grinned as he handed them over, "I got you enough that you could take some guests with you!"_

_"I'll be sure to ask Iruka-sensei the next time I see him," Kakashi had replied, smiling softly at Naruto's half-joking, half-serious pout._)

Sasuke had waited as the other two handed their gifts over, the younger man shifting in slight discomfort when it was finally his turn.

(_"I got you bed sheets," Sasuke had grumbled, handing them over without another word._

_Naruto and Sakura had both scowled at him, their voices ringing in the air as they chastised him on getting such an impersonal gift._

_Kakashi let them yell at him, an ache in his chest as he rubbed his thumb softly over the fabric of the sheets. He'd absentmindedly told his team six months ago that he usually spends his money on clothes and weapons, and not on furnishings, when they had been over for one of their frequent dinners. He'd made a joke about the holes in his sheets, not even thinking about it._

_Kakashi does his best to not tear up as something starts to rights itself in his chest._)

The sheets beside him now aren't the smooth, luxurious fabric that Sasuke had paid a good amount of money for; they are off-white and Kakashi can immediately spot several holes left behind from his ninken getting a little to violent in their attempts to drag his sheets off of him in the morning.

The next thing he notices is that lack of the Hokage robes that he had taken to hanging on the back of his door every night, the white and red fabric within easy reach for whenever he was rushed in the morning to make it to a meeting and someone was sent to drag him there against his will.

Several other details jump out, like a chair he was positive he'd replaced years ago, and a lamp shaped like a pug that Kakashi had found in a little furniture shop hidden in an alley close to Sakura's new apartment; but the real damning detail to the entire fiasco was an innocent looking wooden frame that was laid down on his bedside table.

With a cautious sense of foreboding, Kakashi raised himself up from his crouch, taking several slow steps until he forced himself to hesitantly reach out and flip the frame up.

(_"We need a new team picture," Kakashi had delightfully told his ex-students, gaining pleasure at the simultaneous grimaces that formed on Naruto and Sasuke's faces when they saw Kakashi standing in front of a simple camera set up._

_"Do we have to?" Naruto whined, though he was already heading toward Kakashi, pouting as he took his place by an excited Sakura._

_Sasuke took another moment to join them, a dark look in his eyes, before he finally stood on Sakura's other side, his shoulders stiff as the photographer readied himself behind the camera. _

_Kakashi put his hand on Naruto's shoulder and pulled him slightly closer, the blonde's pout replaced by a grin as the photographer nodded at them. Kakashi hesitated for half a second, uncertain, before he threw caution to the wind and laid a steadying hand on Sasuke's shoulder as well. The dark haired man immediately twitched at the contact. Kakashi hated the fact that he stopped breathing for a second, certain Sasuke would shrug off his hand._

_Instead, all tension seemed to leave his body, a much more relaxed stance following in its place. It's only later when Kakashi is handed the developed picture that he is gifted with the sight of his grumpiest student's small, pleased smile._)

As Kakashi looks down at the picture in front of him, he doesn't remember his students ever being that young and small. Naruto and Sasuke's disgruntled glares greet him, Sakura's childish glee that only thing breaking up the clear discontent featured in the photo. The frame should be made of quality metal, not the old splintery wood that he is cradling in his hand.

Kakashi calmly sets the frame back down, careful to leave the photo face down and out of sight. His jaw tensed as he ground his teeth together, eyes darting around once more, before he finally settles on the calendar hanging inconspicuously beside his bedroom door.

Slowly filling with dread, Kakashi makes his way to the calendar and quickly finds the date, his fingers brushing along the smooth paper until he stops, resting his tense fingers on the next date after the most recent 'x'ed out date.

"Well," Kakashi mutters darkly, cursing as he warily turns away from the damning calendar and heads towards the window in his room, "now no one can yell at me for being late."

It takes less than ten seconds to disarm the seals that line his window, seals that he hasn't used in _years_, and he's outside, swaying slightly as he lands unsteadily on his feet. His headache spikes as soon as he looks up at the sun, gauging the time while trying to ignore the pain plaguing him. The sun is high in the sky, heat beating down in warm rays, and Kakashi takes a moment to soak it up. He has to close his eyes to really enjoy it, but he lets himself simply exist for a moment, lets the warmth of the sun's rays seep into him, fighting off the groggy feeling of _not right_ that's threatening to overtake him.

He forces himself to move after a minute of basking, still feeling nauseous and unsteady as he exists the alley behind his apartment building. The streets of Konohagakure are always busy, even the usually quiet shinobi district. It's high noon and shinobi and civilians alike are out and about. Kakashi does his best to adopt his usual casual appearance, slouched and nonchalant. It works well enough to fool a civilian, surely, but any shinobi worth their salt will be able to tell he's incredibly tense. He can't make himself relax enough to fool anyone, not with the implications his calendar had left him with.

He reaches his destination within a few minutes. He stares up at the Hokage monument, takes in how the last face to grace the mountain is Tsunade's, and he grimly admits to himself that something is officially _not right_. There's no workers atop the mountain, no shinobi observing as they chisel away at more rock to try and cut Kakashi's features into the mountain.

He immediately tests for genjutsu, scolding himself for being thrown off enough to not do that in the first place, but nothing changes. The environment around him does fade away into the Hokage Tower, nor does it even waver. He is just standing in the middle of the street, heart pounding as he stares up at the indisputable sight before him. He's seen enough weird shit in the past decade that he's not even surprised, mostly just resigned.

Resigned to the fact that's he's somehow found himself in the past.

It's after Sasuke abandoned the village, as evidenced by the picture frame being face down on his bedside table. Kakashi hadn't been able to look at his students afterwards. The idea of waking up every morning and seeing Sasuke's scowling face had made a familiar ache appear in his chest. He hadn't been able to will himself to get rid of the picture, nor could he make himself put it away, so he had simply laid it face down, unable to face the truth of Sasuke's abandonment.

The date on his calendar means that Naruto is also gone, has been gone for a year. Kakashi had spent a lot of time worrying about the blonde, guilt searing him nightly at the thought of not being there to protect his sensei's son. He had done such a poor job at protecting Naruto throughout his childhood, but he had at least been in the village. Jiraiya, as godfather, had an even more important role to fill in Naruto's life and had been nowhere to be seen. Knowing that Jiraiya was Naruto's only guardian out in the world didn't give Kakashi a lot of confidence, regardless of the fact that the Toad Sage was one of the strongest shinobi alive.

Shaking off his lingering thoughts, Kakashi turned away from his missign students and instead focused on his most left out student. At this point in time, it's just Kakashi and Sakura left in the village. Kakashi frowns slightly, moving away from the monument and letting his feet guide him to a familiar place.

The first time around, he very rarely saw Sakura. She was his student, and yet he had kept his distance. Losing Sasuke to Orochimaru, seeing him succumb to the darkness that dwells within him, had hit Kakashi hard. He felt like a failure, once more unable to save a teammate who needed him. Seeing Sakura was just another reminder that he wasn't the sensei he should've been; that he was inattentive and unworthy of Minato's legacy. He had ignored that fact that Sakura had needed him just as much as the boys had.

Speaking of teammates that needed him, he stops in front of the Memorial Stone, his eyes following a familiar path. Obito's name is still etched into the stone, the characters laying innocently there like that man isn't alive at this very second. Like he isn't currently planning the death of thousands of innocent people. Like he doesn't hate the very ground Kakashi walks on. Kakashi has to turn away eventually, his emotions bubbling uncomfortably in his chest. Obito was manipulated by Madara and Zetsu, his love of Rin twisted into something unrecognizable, but that isn't enough to excuse what he did; what he put Kakashi through.

He doesn't know how he's back in the past, how he's founded himself completely isolated in a time he had put behind him. He'd gone to bed as the Rokudaime Hokage of Konohagakure, and he'd woken up as Hatake Kakashi, a man lost in his past regrets. He'd thought he'd gotten through the tough times, that he was finally ready to put all of his mistakes behind him. Apparently, the world was of a differing opinion; because, _of course_ it was.

**II.**

It takes Kakashi an unnecessary amount of time to realize that he's getting increasingly disoriented and week because his mask isn't covering his eye. It had taken so long to break the habit of covering his Sharingan-less eye that now that he has to cover it, he's completely forgotten about it. It explains why his vision has been funny and why he's so weak. He feels like an idiot when he catches his reflection in a storefront, Obito's Mangekyou Sharingan staring at him. He quickly pulls his mask up, grimacing as the sensory input that had once been so disorienting was now suddenly cut off.

Clearly he had to get himself together before he really hurt himself.

He isn't exactly sure what he should do in this situation. He's found himself stuck in the past with no idea how he got here. There isn't any memory of him getting struck by an unfamiliar or foreign jutsu. He had gone to bed without any interference on anyone's part. Slipping into sleep had been peaceful. The next thing he knew he was springing awake, just knowing that _something_ wasn't right. No explanation; just Kakashi caught off guard and left struggling to deal with the situation he had found himself in.

It sounds disappointingly familiar.

"Are you sure you're okay, Iruka? You never miss class."

Blinking, Kakashi tilts his head, casually eaves dropping on the three shinobi sitting at the outside table a few feet away from him. Kakashi pretends to browse the tea options in the store window in front of him, using it as a cover to not get caught.

"I told you already, Izumo, I'm fine," Iruka snapped back, an uncharacteristic reaction from the usually even-keeled academy sensei.

Intrigued, Kakashi continues to listen in, vaguely glad that they were sitting to his right so he could see them just out of the corner of his eye.

"Come on, Iruka, you know how much Izumo worries," Hagane Kotetsu gently prods back, easing some of the tension out of Iruka's tightly wound shoulders. "He does have a point though. You never miss class."

Iruka gives a tight shrug in response, his eyes darting around suspiciously as he frowns.

"Well, whatever is bothering you, you can tell us!" Kotetsu assures him, giving a laid back grin before he nods a head towards Izumo. "We have gate duty, so we'll leave you alone for now."

Izumo is no where near as forgiving, but he nods in return, a worried frown still in place as they stand and leave a brooding Iruka.

Kakashi keeps his peripheral vision on Iruka, taking in his sour disposition. Kakashi didn't interact all that much with Iruka at this point, the two of them occupying different social circles. From what Kakashi could remember, the man was often seen around the village, worrying over Naruto. For some reason, Kakashi didn't think that was what had Iruka so troubled.

"If you have something to say, Hatake-san, I suggest you say it," Iruka snapped, glaring over at Kakashi.

Kakashi blinked, surprised at being caught. He stares blankly at Iruka, giving his best 'who me?' look in return.

Iruka rolled his eyes, his shoulder twitching in agitation as he let out an aggravated sigh. "You never change," Iruka muttered darkly, scowling down at the table in front of him.

_I never change?_ Kakashi wonders, a budding hope spreading through his chest. _What an odd thing to say..._

"Is that any way to talk about your esteemed leader, Iruka-sensei?" Kakashi jests back, eye sharp as he takes in Iruka's posture.

Iruka blanched at him, his face going white as he stares up at Kakashi with surprise. "H-Hokage-sama?"

"Ah," Kakashi hums, gracefully slipping into the seat opposite of the shocked teacher. "So you've found yourself in the past as well."

"What is going on?" Iruka demanded, nervously looking around at the passing civilians around them.

"I don't know," Kakashi shook his head, slightly disappointed that Iruka didn't have any answers either, "but we can't talk about it here. We never would've been seen together during this time; meet me outside the academy in a couple of hours. We'll talk then."

Iruka grimaced, unhappy with Kakashi's plan, but he nods nonetheless, knowing damn well that it was the only plan they had. Kakashi wasn't wrong after all, the two of them were known to have an antagonistic relationship between them. The day that Kakashi and Iruka willingly spent time together would be the first sign of the apocalypse. They get along better in the future, of course, but such a sudden shift would immediately put the people around them on guard. No, it's best if they aren't seen interacting too much.

"See you later, Iruka-sensei," Kakashi stated cheerfully, ignoring the half-hearted glare Iruka gave him in return.

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**sorry for the abrupt ending. there was about two more paragraphs after it, but they were cut because it wouldve ended even more abruptly then it already has**


End file.
